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Confused and beyond dazed with a start of a mid li
by James J. Gill

previous entry: Anger and jealously bout things

next entry: Full on jealous and anger towards love

Pure depression and thoughts

11/09/2013

I hate my life and I hate how people will say things when they don't ask what's going on? I've been upset, loney, depressed and hurt for different reasons and now cause I ask for a little space everyone wants to make me out as the bad guy in all of this I have been private bout some of my emotions for a long period of time cause I'm in fear of being called out or other things and what friends I do have left now want to adbondon me cause of a question that I would answer but won't cause I rather say it face to face but it's hard when I don't want other people to know cause of reasons I have and trust factors that have been broken and now the person I still have feelings for just hate me and never want anything to do with me again and yet I'm beyond emotionally confused and wondering if I'm cut out for dating or having a family and the married life but right now I just want to find a hole crawl into it and just wilt away and die cause all I do with dating is fuck up great things and loose women that fall out of love with me and don't find me sexy or alluring anymore I'm a complete fat blob that don't deserve love, happiness and kids I deserve being treated like shit used and abused and pretty much a worthless peice of scum

previous entry: Anger and jealously bout things

next entry: Full on jealous and anger towards love

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