*~chaos embodied~*
by _-nukcleur.pink-_

your such a screw up.

09/05/2011

so i fucked up. big surprise. yesterday was the ending point of me being rid of X. he text me for like 3 days.. just every now and then i got a text. he even sent me a video on fb. crossfade, cold. and i started crying but then i realized he was online and he started talking to me. so we talked for a sec, logged off and then 3 days later i guess he starts wiggin out "whats going on? please tell me" shit like that. i was completely fucking speechless. i mean how can you tell someone "leave me the fuck alone i swear to god, dont talk to me" or something to that effect and then be ignored [his texts] for that long and not KNOW youve been dumped? so he text me that and i was like thats exactly what i meant. and hes like "yeah well you can come get your shit and pay me back" then it was something else like.. not as asshole-ish, then it was like you always get frustrated and give up. well yeah. cuz your a sorry fucking piece of shit who abuses me and i dont want any part of you. except the sex. but.. this is just fucked. ok so i talked to hi yesterday and im like im going to the store... whatever.. and hes like telling me wanted to cook for me.. so i end up going over there. ofcourse. we have some kind of spell on each other i think. i dont know but its horrible. the sex last night wasnt though. and i missed him. and its just... ugh!! i dont know. anyway.. thats what happened. now hes buying a car im pretty sure and he wants me to get the rents to chip in split the money and get me this car. my car is falling apart. literally. but it wont happen. =[ sad. anyway im done. fuck it.

previous entry: bad blood

next entry: poetry? pshh

0 likes, 3 comments

[ | add comment ]

Add Comment

you don't have a spell on each other. you're fucked in the head and attracted to men who abuse you. and he KNOWS he can abuse you, so he will do whatever he can to keep you around.

by the way, abusers never abuse one person. they always have a second person they keep around, just in case their primary abusee finally smartens up.

[.erodium.|0 likes] [|reply]

thanks for your input bitch, who are you to try to tell me shit about myself? you dont know me, you dont know what my past holds, you know nothing. and i dont need you coming on here giving me your god damn "advice"; nothing. i have a shrink and plenty of shit thrown my way from my family, thank you. i am well aware that i have demons and am attracted to fucked up men. im in the process of breaking the cycle and breaking up with this asshole. im trying to get the fucking car. and you dont know who he's got around so fuck you. stay off my page, i dont need your advice, commentary, bullshit, NOTHING. i thought you were nice but your just another fucking person trying to kick me while im down. but guess what? im on my way up and this kinda shit isnt gonna effect me for long. ive got plans. ive got plenty. so fuck off and go fuck with someone else. the shit you said was pretty fucking low in my opinion.. but whatever. if thats who you chose to be, so be it.

[_-nukcleur.pink-_|0 likes] [|reply]

not trying to kick you while you're down. i apologize if it came across that way. but i'm not the type to come here, read something like this, and then say, "oh that sucks." i've been in your shoes -- i was in an abusive relationship. i, too, was fucked in the head, and i wish someone would have smacked me around and made me realize that THAT isn't how relationships are supposed to be. I wish you luck with your demons, but I don't need someone coming back at me with anger when all i was trying to do was help (albeit, not in a manner that you desire). So I'll agree that we leave each other alone and stay off each others' pages.

[.erodium.|0 likes] [|reply]

Diary added to your faves.

Online Friends

Offline Friends