Last night Smiles and I went out on a date with a girl called Alias.
When we first met her she was using different names when she introduced herself to different people. Interesting actually. She claimed that sometimes she just felt sick of saying the same name so she changes it. That night we met her we made out and planned to catch up again. It was Smiles first successful Pick Up (PU).
Anyways.
The rules of engagement we're simple.
We had successfully sparked Attraction. We needed to build comfort before we could hit seduction.
When she arrived we got to chatting, both girls looked great, Smiles was making great conversation but perhaps it was a bit too stale, it wasn't really flirting. Something she needs to work on. I have to admit I was very nervous that night. There were times I did not know what I should do and I hesitated a lot. I think this is what I was most disappointed about. Not me at all.
Smiles, being my girlfriend and my wing girl, meant we have particular rules and boundaries I respect and will always continue to follow.
So when I saw the opportunity. I asked her.
"Smiles, is it ok if I kiss Alias? she looks very yummy"
"Of course" she affirmed
I leaned and kissed Alias, it was slow, soft. Something sensual. I didn't take much time for myself it was simply to get the mood going. Then I suggested Smiles leaned in to kiss her too. They both leaned in and made out. Something I admit turned me on something chronic.
I went in close and nibbled and kissed their shoulders and necks. I noticed a few people were staring.
This is where I failed.
I miscalculated when I suggested going back to our place. I guess I just assumed she knew why we we're here after our last encounter. Threesomes are new to us and we are just learning. So it's all different to us.
She was not comfortable enough after one make out for the night and she did not want to leave the club. Respectfully of course, I suggested we go dance instead.
Though I felt I had killed the moment. We had not passed the Comfort stage.
The idea of Comfort, is to let a girl get to know you better as a person. A great time to demonstrate your character and to make a connection with her. That's what second dates are usually about.
I had completely forgotten about this.
Also, I had relied too much on the latest techniques out there. Which have been made by pigs for pigs who want nothing but drunk, low self esteemed girls. Never again.
Attraction > Comfort > Seduction.
You cannot have one before the other. In some cases, for example long time friends.. who already have Comfort... can one day suddenly feel attraction.
Though when it comes to meeting new people. The three rules must be followed in that exact order.
The calculated time that is given, from the time you meet, dates, phone calls to the bedroom can average between 7-10 hours.
So basically in this case, I didn't have enough Comfort before I asked her back to our place. Hopefully she will want to catch up again. Usually when a girl feels like she is going to be used for sex and sex only. She will hesitate to call someone back. Depends on the girl of course but I feel this is what is going to happen here.
No big deal.
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