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Jess ica Murphy 's Diary
by Jess ica Murphy

previous entry: Pushing for Summer

next entry: The Roller

Family Awkwardness

04/05/2009

pretty smiles && make up quote
The Sound of Settlement.
I've realized finally the oddity of what my family relationships are.
My dad and I have come from a horrible history of anger. But we're finally trying to make it work and it seems to be turning out decently.

I have to focus a minute on the awkward stance between my mum, my stepfather and I.

My mum has known him since she was thirteen. Some things happend and he ended up in jail by the age of fifteen. Anyway when I was a child I remember every holiday recieving letters and cards from him, letters. I'd draw and send him cards. All while my mum was married to my biological father.
My parents divorced when I was seven or eight.

My mum to this day still loves him. It's odd for me because I never consider her two marriages (my brothers father and my own) to have any substance. I've always considered her and my stepfather, as married, and a couple. Regaurdless they are not married or technically even in a relationship. I met him for my first time about two months ago. I hugged him and told him I loved him. I've known and talked with him my whole life, be it through the phone or letters. I do love him. He always told my mum my brother and I should have been his children.

It seems weird to me to love someone so much who I've only physically met once in my entire life. But I do. Very much. Everytime my mum talks to or about him, her eyes just light up and I know, so well he's always been the one for her. Their love has endured almost fourty years of hardships and still stays strong.

What seems weirdest to me is how easily I accept that he is my stepfather. That I call him my stepfather even without any legit legal conditions.

Maybe it's just me.

It's nice and sunny out today. It's always so damn windy on the nice days.


- this layout was made by simple layouts.

previous entry: Pushing for Summer

next entry: The Roller

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