awkward soul sprain

06/11/2009

of course
i sit here,
splaying my soul across the page-
clumsily,
forcefully

but...
in reality...


i can't-
not like this-
can't just turn
from a lifetime's friendship,

(at least
not without a reason
less flimsy than these awkward soul spillings.)

but
there will be a reason
because i need to.

i know-
oh i know-
please don't tell me
how selfish i am

(not that you would tell me-
perhaps i'd rather you did)

i know

i don't like it
necessarily
but

i exist too
and i want to live
really live