I think your children will know how proud you are of them and how much they are loved because you are so aware of how important it is to hear. I'm so sorry you never got to see your mum before she passed. But she sounds like she did the best she could for you and I imagine after your dad passed, yes she had to work hard to carry on, but she did it for you because of the love she had for you. My partner (Allen) doesn't remember a lot of before losing his mum at 12. He has big blank spaces. It's heartbreaking but I see how much he tries to give his children what he would have wanted. He tells them how wonderful they are and how proud he is regularly and it's lovely to see.
"As parents, we realize our parents have lived two lives and now they're living their third." This is really thought provoking to me. Allen has also said he never got to know his mum as a person, she was just "mum" to him. He didn't know her as a person with a life before him and interests she had. It really is such a thing to go through losing your parents young.
Hope you're doing well. Your family look like such a beautiful (and I imagine chaotic!) bunch! xx
when my mother was a stay at home mom she bought a bread maker and she would make bread ALL THE TIME. Nothing like the smell of bread baking that is lingering all through the house!!!!
My dad always put everything in the bread maker at night too and it would always smell so good first thing in the morning. Nothing like fresh, warm bread at breakfast.
the only death in my family is my grandmother and she passed almost 10 years ago. I miss her dearly. She was the only one that truly understood me and I could talk to her about anything— things I couldn’t talk about with my mother. I think deep down she knew the way my parents were treating me. Everyone deals with grief in their own ways.
Death is hard and it is a lonely experience or sure. I come from a very large family and have lost my parents (when I was 26 and 31) & 30 aunts & uncles between the two sides. Cousins, friends and two siblings. 22 weeks ago I lost my wife of 35 years, that's been a hard kick in the teeth I'm still trying to work through. It's been the worst loss so far and probably the worst I will ever experience. Nobody can really teach you how to handle death because it is so individual to each person. Like you said, the spaghetti of emotions come at you one after another.
When losing both parents, at any age, it must feel like you've been orphaned. My said that she felt orphaned after both her parents died. I think your reaction to your moms death was fine, everyone deals with grief differently.
Loss of a loved one, especially a parent, is really hard. I never got to know my father and finding out he had passed away just a few months before we located his whereabouts still weighs heavily on me from time to time. Grief is a funny thing; there's no right or wrong way to do it. And strange details stick in your mind surrounding it. When my aunt passed, I was supposed to be starting at a new school and I missed the first two weeks. I remember seeing some teens outside our house having a snowball fight and stopping and waving at me. I wasn't in a place to even attempt to wave back so I just turned away and went to my room. Holding onto the lovely memories you have, and sharing them are precious.
OMG!!!! So every year [or almost] the family goes up North and stays in a cabin for a week. We always get an upgraded one with a full kitchen and a spa bathtub JUST like that!!! It’s freaking glorious! Get some epsom salt now ( bath salts) and you’ll be in heaven. Epsom salts help relax the muscles and whatnot. GLORIOUS!!!
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But he was very old. (being born in '37) so I know he never suffered much. I will always cherish his memory ♥
an old neighbor of ours bought a bread maker and she was so excited about it! If I had more space....lol
mother used to have a bread slicer thing, and she would always cut off the ends.
the only death in my family is my grandmother and she passed almost 10 years ago. I miss her dearly. She was the only one that truly understood me and I could talk to her about anything— things I couldn’t talk about with my mother. I think deep down she knew the way my parents were treating me. Everyone deals with grief in their own ways.
