WEEEEE!!!! Last week of school.

05/26/2009

OK as you all know I was having a bad day because of something I had done this weekend. I'm slowly getting over it and accepting it, but I can't say it on here yet. I have to tell some people in person before I'm comfortable with letting everyone on bloop know.
Anyway, this morning, I was fine. I was having a good time not paying attention to my thoughts because I was enjoying myself. My teacher, Ashley Brown (dance teacher at sail high school) was teaching two students a dance (don't ask me why, I don't really know), and one of the students was having trouble. While she was teaching them the dance, he looked down at me and said, "I don't know this shit." And we both laughed about it for like two seconds, and then I was watching Ashley and I noticed that the terms she was using weren't helping him, so I said, "You are going to go from being in releve into a sit position." Thats all I said. I was going to stop talking to them and "distracting them" when Ashley decides to say something along the lines of "I'm the teacher, let me teach." That kind of hurt me so I say (kind of loudly), "Jesus Christ, sorry for trying to help." And she had the nerve to like call me out on things that I don't do. I don't remember everything she said because the more she talked, the more pissed/upset I was getting, but it was something like this, "But its unnecessary. You don't need to try to help, you're not even dancing. You're on the floor. I know if you were trying to learn a dance, and someone tried to help you, you wouldn't like." I interrupted her and said, "Actually if someone was trying to help me I would appreciate it." This is when she calls me out and says, "I know that when you're learning a dance, and there is someone on the sidelines talking, you get upset." She said more, I just don't remember it. I was that pissed off already.
So I get up slowly, I get some water, and then I go to the other room, I put my shoes on, and I walked out the door. My friend Kayce, bless her heart, came to get me and try to calm me down, I wasn't having it. I think Kayce said something a long the lines of come back, and she shook her head to like signal me where to go (inside obviously lol.), and I like blew up at her, not on her because I knew she hadn't done anything wrong, but I was like yelling about how I don't need Ashley's shit right now. I don't need her fucking shit. Its fucking bull shit!! She can't sit there and tell me how I'm going to act. I turned, kicked a recycling bin, really hard it flew and fell over and all the recyclable things in it flew everywhere, I didn't care, she started cleaning it up and I told her to leave it there it doesn't fucking matter.
I'm now practically storming around the school, and I punch a glass case (I think it was plexi [sp?] glass, so it didn't break or anything, but it felt good to punch it), and was just speed walking everywhere. I walked into the student parking lot, and I sat down on the ground for like two seconds, and then I figured I might as well have a smoke. So I needed to find one, and I knew one person who would give me one no matter how many she had left if she knew that I was upset (which she did, and her name is Lexi Bell, I love her soo much), so she gave me one, and Kayce found me and was like, "Do you want to go for a smoke? I can take you." So we went off, during the middle of school, and I smoked to calm myself down a little bit. She told me that she told Ashley off after she cleaned up the recycling bin and stuff. Which made me really happy. So I told her everything I was able to remember at the time about what happened two nights ago. She then psuedo convinced me to skip because I really wanted to, and I kind of needed to. She then took me to McDonalds and bought me breakfast, and then she bought me a pack of cigs. THANK YOU KAYCE!!!!! I love you!

Being able to tell someone whats really on your mind is one of the best things that can happen to you. I feel so much better now!! I skipped second period (block scheduling, so I technically missed two periods, but whatever), and came back and I was so calmed down. I felt bad for skipping because I normally never do that unless its for a good cause. So I went to second period teacher, and I apologized and told her why I wasn't in class. She said she understands needing me time, and that she's sorry I was having a bad morning. She asked me if everything was going to be alright, and I told her that I'm fine now, and that everythings ok. She said it was fine that I skipped, and I told her again, that I just wanted to apologize because I felt it would've been better to go calm down, instead of being in the mood I was in and in class. She agreed with me. WOOT! Go Carrie Perkins.

I don't know why I feel the need to put everyone's last name in here too. Lol.

I'm also on a very high dosage of ADHD medicine, so thats probably why.
Just to fill you all in, I don't take ADHD medicine. Lol.

I love you Raena Merkison, Kay Cessna (sp?), Kayla Sims, Shelbi Noffsinger (sp?), Lexi, Kayce, the people at McDonalds (lol) Kevin McDonnell(because he called me and reminded me that I needed to turn in my alternate exam form saying I'm allowed to take them and miss school), and Dylan Ortiz (for texting me and also reminding me that I need to turn in my form and bring my book back)
Thank you all who love and care for me. I love you all very very much!
~!KoofY!~ aka Cody