yellow

i feel crazy, up and down, down and up, good and bad

i think about healing and growing, and then the monsters come back

and i think about simply existing, and he fills my head, and i miss him

more than anything i miss him

but he is healing. i think he is forgetting about me, because he said he needs to. i am okay with that, sometimes.

i just want him to heal. and i will too, sometime, down the road.

so in the mean time, i am finding some gooooooood distractions.