I woke up to the most rancid smell in the world, thanks to baby, and now I can't get back to sleep. We didn't do much of anything for Thanksgiving this year, for obvious reasons. Charlie was either the sweetest cuddle baby in the world, or a complete screeching nightmare today, with little in between. We were supposed to go to my uncle in law's house today, because it was supposed to be a small get together where we could feel safe, given my wife's asthma, but then we saw a picture on Instagram of them going to this massive Thanksgiving celebration where like 20 people were present, so we said fuck that.
My mother in law came over, and they hung out with Bianca for a while. I fucked off because the smallest social interactions get me overwhelmed these days. I just want to do my work, and be a husband and father these days. I never thought I wouldn't miss the concept of "friends", but if all the people I used to know dropped off the face of the earth, I don't even know if I would notice. That might be kind of sad, but... it's actually kind of nice. It feels sort of anonymous, just worrying about my wife and my kid, and thinking about his impact, instead of getting wrapped up in other people's lives. I always found myself getting, I don't know, too involved with others. I would want to know everything about them, and it always got to the point where I ended up involved in some bullshit drama that had nothing to do with me, and I would get burned more often than not.
Maybe I'll change my mind in the future, and come out stir-crazy from the lack of social interaction, but as of right now, there's something really nice about just worrying about two of my favorite people, and family, and not giving a shit about anyone outside of that circle. |
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