i feel pretty and witty and gay.

04/29/2011

you know what? i'm really happy! and i'm sick of having to downplay or hide that fact, because other people are in shitty situations. but i'll continue to [mostly] shut up, because i'm not going to rub my wedding in the face of my perpetually single and pining after the wrong girl best friend. i'm not going to flaunt my fantastic new car and destination wedding plans to my friend who is struggling to make ends meet as she breaks up with her boyfriend. i'm not rude, and i'm generally not selfish.
however, this is it my space in which to be joyful and proud. so here it comes.
i logged onto the knot's website for the first time in months, and it informed me that my wedding is in 283 days. 283 DAYS! a long ways off, certainly, but less than a year. less than 10 months. squee! my excitement for the wedding seems to come in waves. obviously i was very excited at first, then calmed down a little, then got very excited again when i started looking at [and trying on!] dresses, then the excitement subsided again slightly. now, with travel plans coming together, my excitement level is once again sky-high.
emails back and forth with our travel agent the past week or two have been very successful, and resulted in her finding us a better price AND the ability to all travel together. originally, most of the group was travelling from toronto, friday-friday, with those flying out of winnipeg [lindsay and her husband, and josh's family] going thursday-thursday. that was the best we could do, given the flights and packages available. however, nicole found another company flying out of toronto for $300/person less, and our original tour company agreed to match that price, flying out of toronto, friday-friday. given the savings [$500/person vs. original winnipeg quote], the others can fly to toronto, spend the night in a hotel with us, and we can all travel to the dominican together friday, feb 3rd. this is amazing! i was okay with the time-delay if that was how it had to be, but i'm so much happier with this option! now that the tour company, dates, and prices are locked down, we've officially put deposits on the trip. it's all real. really real! i am sooo super pumped about both the vacation and the wedding.
also gearing up my wedding excitement, is the super-secret trip lindsay is making "home" [to her parents'] next weekend. there are some family celebrations going on, and she's surprising her mom and siblings with a quick weekend trip down here, with sullivan in tow. obviously the focus of her trip is on her own family, but we've agreed that we must see each other as well. i'll be going up to my mom's [her parents and mine live 2 blocks apart - such a ridiculous coincidence] and will see linds [and sully!] saturday afternoon and/or sunday. lindsay is at least as excited about i am for the wedding, and feels badly that she's "not doing anything" to prepare for it. there's really nothing to do at this point, other than ponying up a deposit for the trip, and giving me input on what she wants to wear. my mom has ordered a few dresses for me to try on, and they should be at her house, waiting for me. lindsay has seen pictures of every dress i've tried on so far, but i know that she wants to see me in a dress, so this is quite good timing. i'm also going to hit up the local bridal boutiques with my mom, and lindsay if she wants to come [and has time]. i want to include her as much as possible, but i refuse to make this weekend about me. i'm also planning to take my henkaa dress up with me, play around with different styles, and see if linds is interested in it as a maid of honour dress. it's really up to her, but it could totally work for the wedding, and beyond, which is something i'm insisting on for her dress. my mom and i played around with it a little when she was down here last, and it was really cool to see what we could come up with. i promise to take pictures of every style we try, if for no reason other than future reference when i'm trying to wrap it by myself.
also making me happy, is that despite a shitty cold, i feel great today. i totally fell off the wagon last night, and devoured a whole small cheese pizza [what even!?] for dinner. i was starving, and sick, and that's all i wanted, but afterwards i felt like i was such an idiot for doing that, sure that it ruined my diet for certain. it didn't. in fact, i weigh 0.2 lbs more than i did yesterday, and with normal fluctuation, that's entirely fine. that slip did not cause me to abandon the diet completely, with an "i can re-start it after the weekend" attitude, like i was afraid it might. i've eaten within my limits today, and i'm happy with that. in fact, i feel like i look pretty great. i've got new yoga pants on, and they make my bum look nice. i've also got a flat tummy today. of course it's still very wide, and thick, but it's flat. it reminds me of when i was in the best shape of my adult life a few years ago - the first time i ever wore a bikini in public. i have a long way to go with my body, but i feel good, and healthier, and that's what this is all about.