Last night I went to a party with my old roommate (who is straight but has had sex with two girls when drunk). It was a girls-only party. There were three other girls there. One straight and two bisexuals. Not that it mattered because everyone at the party was in a relationship, myself included. My relationship is different though-it's an open relationship. Not the kind of relationship I want but my girlfriend wants to see other people too. So she's been seeing other people while I remain faithful to her and not even look at other girls or look for others to date. I must be crazy to agree to that but I figure it's better to have part of her than none of her, I guess. Maybe I'll change my mind later on. We'll see.
Back to the party. So this girl... We'll call her Betty. She's a mutual friend of my roommate and me. A really good friend. I love her-she's so friendly and outgoing. She's bisexual. Another girl.. Let's call her Veronica, also a bisexual. The third girl, "Nancy." (All fake names)
All of the girls were downstairs in the kitchen, just chatting. Veronica decided to make Lemon Drops. I'm not sure what kind of hard liquor she used for the shot but she cut pieces of lemon and smothered them with sugar then poured some kind of liquor over them then lit a flame to them. The flames burnt the liquor, not the lemon. It was fun to watch. We would take a shot then quickly suckle on the piece of lemon. I had no after taste or burning down my throat. It was actually sweet. I think I had three lemon drops. Not consecutive. A total of three the entire night. I also had a total of three Mike's Hard Lemonades and one shot of Tarantula. I'm not lightweight but I'm also not overweight. I'm a very fit person, athletic. So I didn't think the alcohol would really affect me that much. Boy, how wrong I was.
I was feeling pretty relaxed. Nancy (the straight girl) went to bed. So it was us bisexuals left. My roommate then started kissing both Betty and Veronica. Now when people start kissing each other, it gets awkward for me. I'm extremely shy so I kind of step back into the shadows and watch from a distance.
Betty noticed this. So she asked me if I was fine and I said yeah. Then all of a sudden, the alcohol hit me. I was full-on drunk. However I still could walk fine and talk fine. I just felt like a spell of vertigo hit me. At that time, my brain kind of became two halves. One half of me was the logical one that was analyzing everything and telling me what to do. The other half was the carefree part, where I didn't give a shit about anything and wanted to have fun. Normally I can suppress the carefree part but with some prodding and the right setting, the carefree part shows. That happened last night.
We went outside to stand on the balcony. It was freezing outside. My roommate, Betty, and Veronica wanted to step outside to smoke. I don't smoke but I had to step outside because I was handcuffed to Betty. Oh that's right, I forgot to mention that Betty had handcuffed me to her. She stuffed the key in her bra and I wasn't going to put my hand down her shirt to fish out the key and free myself. So I just stood there in the cold, with a coat. At that time I'm feeling even more and more drunk. The alcohol was really hitting me hard now. Betty finally felt bad for me and freed me from the handcuff (after being cuffed for maybe an hour). I decided to brave the cold temperature and stay outside with them because I felt awkward inside alone.
I'm not sure exactly how but somehow the conversation goes:
My roommate: I've had sex with two girls while drunk.
Betty: I'm still a girl virgin. I'm very curious though.
Me: .......
Veronica: (directed to Betty) You always complain about not having sex with a girl yet you won't try with me!
Me: *laughs*
Betty: *is quiet*
My roommate: You should totally have sex with __________! (me)
Betty: But doesn't she have a girlfriend?
My roommate: Yes but it's an open relationship!
Veronica: Oy, this is going to be very interesting (because she knows me-I'm very shy about this kind of stuff)
Me: ...... (feeling very awkward, unsure of what to say because I'm so freaking drunk)
Betty: *approaches me* If I kissed you, would you kiss me back or push me away?
Me: Uh.... *struggling to keep the logical half in control and not let the carefree, spontaneous half get in control*
My roommate: I'll turn off the balcony lights! This will put her in the mood! *goes to turn off the light*
I immediately walked to the end of the balcony and put myself in the corner because I didn't know what to do. I was fighting a losing battle. Part of me wanted her. Part of me wanted to kiss her but the other part of me was scared. I was scared that I would suck at kissing because I haven't seen my girlfriend since last September (2008). So I was out of practice. Betty approached me yet again and asked what was wrong. I confessed my fears to her.
Veronica: *jumps in conversation* Betty is a good kisser. She will tell you if you suck or not. If you do suck, no hard feelings. We don't care. We're drunk!
Me: *laughs*
What happened next caught me off guard. I was leaning back, into the corner. Betty immediately came onto me and put one hand around my back and the other on my cheek. That move completely destroyed the last shreds of my logical half, at least for the time being. The carefree, happy half took over completely. I leaned forward and our lips connected. While kissing her, I had the image of my girlfriend's face in my head the entire time. I didn't feel guilty. I knew my girlfriend wouldn't mind. After all, this is what she wanted in the first place, isn't it? An open relationship.
After maybe 5 minutes, Betty pulls away.
Me: *looks down, feeling a little shy*
Betty: Wow. You're really good. Really good.
Me: *even more shy now, not making eye contact at all* Thanks....
Betty leaned in for more action and this time it was longer. I honestly don't know how long it was. My heart was beating fast. I wanted more of her. I wanted more. So I kind of let my hands wander. Betty didn't stop my hands and I didn't go south of her belt. She had her hand under my shirt, around the back. Her hand was freezing but that didn't dissuade me at all. I liked how the cold hand kept me alert. A few times one of her hands would kind of slip down and start to dig under my jeans-I would stop this. No below-the belt action for me. After awhile of this, Betty pulled away yet again.
Betty: Damn. I better stop now or else I'm going to rape you right there on the spot.
Me: *laughs*
My roommate: Wow you guys were making out for a long time!
Veronica: You're lucky. Betty never makes out with anyone that long. You're very lucky. I envy you.
Me: Why do you envy me?
Veronica: Because that means you're a really good kisser.
Betty: That, I can vouch for.
Me: *blushes* Thanks I guess.
Betty: You made me so hot. I can't stand it.
Me: I can say the same for myself.
*everyone laughs*
We went back inside. I'm kind of fuzzy on things but that was pretty much the highlight of the party. I don't feel guilty for making out with Betty. I don't think that I was cheating. However I'm not sure if I should tell my girlfriend. I don't want to just bring it out of the blue, making it sound like I'm showing off or something. But I also don't want to make it seem like I'm hiding it-because I'm not. I didn't have sex with Betty and I don't plan to. For me, sex is very intimate. I can only have sex with someone if I truly love them or have very strong feelings for them. I've only had sex with two girls. Never went down on them but had penetration.
I'm not sure because I was drunk but I think that Veronica either has the hots for Betty or wanted to kiss me too-maybe both. I don't know. I did get a good lap dance from Betty. It was hot.
Okay now that's off my chest, I think I'm going to go to bed. I have a long day. I don't know when my next update will be. Maybe the next party or something like that. |
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